Posted in April 2009 …

Apr 23 2009
3 Comments
Business, Facebook, Fashion, Friends, Me, Myself and I

Can We Have Take Your Classmate to Work Day?

I’ve heard a lot of people complaining about Facebook, questioning why in the world they’d want to be in touch with their entire high school class and I understand why some folks would say that. But I see it differently.

Facebook has allowed me to not only reminesce with the people I grew up with but to see what interesting people they’ve become as adults. I have to say, I’m pretty proud to have known so many awesome people. Many of them are doing really cool things. Below, I highlight three women I grew up with who have started their own businesses following their passions.

Live in San Francisco and own a dog? Then you should get to know Fetch in the City. FITC is run by my best friend from junior high, Jessey. She offers play groups for dogs as well as customized pet sitting. Her playgroups, which have a maximum of eight dogs each, get their fitcexercise off-leash at Fort Funston. Anyone who knows Jessey knows she has a passion for animals. She nearly got me killed riding a horse once (ok, not killed…we were in a ring and the horse was barely trotting but it scared the snot out of me anyway), but I still love her.

sweet-buds-floralJessey and I both were soccer players throughout high school and a teammate of ours, Naomi, is also running her own business in San Francisco. Sweet Buds Floral designs beautiful bouquets of flowers and delivers anywhere in San Francisco for $13. They also deliver for weddings and events throughout the Bay Area and into wine country. Definitely not your run-of-the-mill carnations, these designs are breathtaking. Order your Mother’s Day bouquet today!

In addition to beautiful flowers, what better gift for mom than a way to stay fashionable while smocksshe’s serving as the hostess at her dinner party? Look no further than Smocks Design. When having company over, no one wants to ruin their good clothes while preparing dinner, but aprons can be so blah. Kelley, who I went to elementary, junior high and high school with, and her mom have you covered…literally. When Page Six Magazine decided to cut back to publishing quarterly, Kelley, who served as the mag’s fashion editor, went to work on creating her own company which promotes “the art of entertaining” by bringing high fashion to the apron-wearing set. They purchase remnant fabric from designers, so not only is the cut stylish and flattering, the fabric is too. While Kelley’s not kicking off new business ventures, she and her mom also search for style and substance together on their blog, Cuts on the Bias. It’s a daily read on my netvibes page.

I admire all three of these women for taking risks and following their passions. Go check out what they have to offer and I’m sure you will come to admire them too.

Apr 22 2009
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Animals, Family, Our 'Hood, Parenting

My Kids Are 5 and 2 But I’ve Got Empty Nest Syndrome Already

Friday night last week, our 6 month old puppy Mater was in the backyard acting weird. I saw him looking up at one of our trees going ape shit. He actually tried to climb a 6 foot tall wood fence to get closer. Because we live in a new neighborhood with new trees, we have no normal suburban wildlife (like squirrels) so I didn’t really think much about it and went on with my evening.

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Three of the chicks on Sunday morning.

The next (beautiful!) day, we spent the entire day doing yardwork. As I was cleaning up the back corner of the yard, I remembered Mater’s behavior and decided to take a look. Sure enough, right at eye level there was a nest with two little baby birds looking at me with their beaks wide open. I stared for a few minutes and then realized that their mom and dad were in my neighbor’s tree watching me and those chicks looked hungry, so I left.

I know absolutely nothing about birds. (I think they may be Western Meadowlarks or Lesser Goldfinches but I could be wrong.) But, man, their behavior was so interesting to me. All weekend I was drawn to this little bird family. It ends up there were not two but four. And they were growing by the day!

It’s no surprise, really, because that mommy and daddy bird were busy! Their routine was something like this: Mom & Dad (making assumptions here…since I know nothing about birds I’m assuming they are in a heterosexual relationship…no clue if that’s right) fly into the area together and make a few circles around the tree where the nest is. They’re checking out the territory and making sure everything is ok. They’re very vocal. One (I like to say Mom but I really don’t know) swoops into the tree to a chorus of baby chirps while Dad hangs out in a high location nearby, presumably keeping watch. Then once Mom is done, they switch places and Dad feeds the babies. The chicks are instantly calmed and Mom and Dad fly away noisily. The chicks curl up together and take a nap and the cycle starts all over again.

D, our 5 year old, witnessed this routine as well and he had a lot of questions and since he still believes that I know everything I narrated the show to the best of my abilities. What was so remarkable, to both of us, really, was how familiar this pattern of parent/child behavior was. Now, if I’m remembering the one day I didn’t cut freshman year biology correctly, the feeding is done when the Mom and Dad regurgitate whatever they found on their hunting expedition for the babies to eat. I’ve never done that, though I did chew food for my kids a few times when they were just starting to eat solids. I’m also pretty sure that if I had left my kids all by themselves in their cribs when they were days old, CPS would have been over to visit with a quickness. But all-in-all observing their behavior was yet another reminder of how natural parenting is for many animals, humans included.

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The Mom and Dad on the top of our neighbhor's tree, waiting to feed their babies.

It reminded me of an incident that happened the summer before we moved from DC to California, when I was about 7 months pregnant with B. We had a little townhouse with a little yard and in it we had a blue tarp. We went to clean up the yard before we put the house on the market and realized a mouse (or rat?) had made the tarp its home. We scared it away but realized a few minutes later that there was an entire litter of rodents left behind. I called the local animal services people and the woman on the phone said, “Rodents are mammals. Mammal mothers don’t abandon their babies. She’ll be back.” I burst into tears. The sappy, can’t explain to your husband when he asks what’s wrong kind. (Hey, I was pregnant. I blame it on the hormones.)

My point is that motherhood, parenthood, is not just about procreation. It’s about so much more than that, for wild animals and humans alike. It’s about the things that Mom and Dad bird did to put food in their kids’ bellies. It’s about the pain that we feel when our kids are hurting. The sacrifices we make to keep a roof over their head (or a nest under their bum, as the case may be). And the heartbreak we go through when something goes terribly wrong.

I was so drawn to those four chicks over the past four days that my heart broke a little when I came home this evening and the nest was empty. Of course, D and I celebrated that they had grown up and moved away, lest I discourage him from doing the same thing some day. I just hope they come back to visit and know that when they do, they’ll find their bedroom just as they left it.

Apr 17 2009
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Me, Myself and I, My Boys, Parenting, Sports

I’m Either Raising a Master Manipulator Or I Suck As A Mother

While we were on our vacation in Michigan, D (our 5 year old), asked Scoot, “Daddy, will you stop being on the computer?” He then repeated the question to me. The next day, the two of us had a conversation about it and decided that while we’re not on the computer all that much, if our kid is mentioning it to us then perhaps we should cut back. Problem solved.

Until last night.

While driving home from registering D from his first soccer league, I mentioned to him that I have a soccer game at 9 pm tonight. His response: “Mommy, I don’t want you to play soccer any more.”

What? Why? I play one game once a week and it’s one of two outside-the-house activities I do (the other being the neighborhood association board which meets once a month for two hours).

“Because I want you to have fun time with me.”

OK, kid, so why don’t you break my heart while you’re at it? Am I really that bad of a mother?

I’ve always been proud of myself for not participating in a lot of non-kid activities. Though Scoot and I both work fulltime, we spend as much time as possible with our children outside of work hours. We put them in daycare near our work so that we could spend extra time on our long commute together. I can count on one hand the number of times they’ve been watched by someone other than one of us…IN 5 YEARS!

So now I’m vacillating between thinking I’m a horrible mother and thinking I’ve raised a total manipulator. Does he know that when he says stuff like that he’ll get his way? Even if “spending fun time with me” means he’s playing in his playroom while I’m doing the dishes or changing his brother’s diaper?

Don’t think I’m being too harsh on the kid…he really does know how to work it. A couple weeks ago he wanted to get “biscuit” (Lucille’s BBQ) for dinner and Scoot was ready to make a meal at home. D turned to his daddy, and said something along the lines of, “Daddy, can we please have biscuit? I’ll be so happy” and then gave him a kiss. Game. Over.

But even so, if a kid says they want more time, even if they get as much of it as you think you can give, shouldn’t you listen? Is spending a few hours a month on your own activities selfish? I’m so confused. Halp!

Apr 14 2009
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RIP

RIP Madeline Alice Spohr

madeline

 

To read more about Madeline Alice Spohr, please visit March for Maddie. There you can read her story and make a donation to her March of Dimes team or to her family to help defray the costs of her funeral.

Thanks to It’s A Schmitty Life for the photo above.

Apr 12 2009
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Family, RIP

A Satisfied Mind

Six years ago this spring, my Grandma Johnson died. My heart broke for many reasons: I was pregnant with my first son and I knew she and my kids would never know one another (a loss for them both); her death was sudden and so came as a bit of a surprise (although she was still 83 years old) and I was totally unprepared; I was on an airplane on my way to say a last goodbye when my dad called to say that she had passed away and so felt I had missed out. But most of all I was heartbroken because the love of my Grandfather’s life, the woman who he had spent the last 63 years with, was gone and he was left alone.

And so, for the past six years, every time I’ve heard Randy Travis’ Satisfied Mind, I’ve bawled my eyes out. If you’re unfamiliar with it, it includes these words:

“He said I ain’t afraid of dying ‘cause I know there’s something worse,

When you have to see your reason for living go first

And you get left behind.

Some can’t think of nothing better than to live this life forever,

I never wanted no more than was mine

And to lay down some day and go home with a satisfied mind.

He said don’t look into the darkness if you wanna see true black,

Look into the morning’s brightness at love ain’t coming back

And you will find right there the darkness that blinds.

And don’t think wealth is ever having all you want all to yourself.

It is found when you are giving what you have to someone else.

The only difference in the rich and the poor is a satisfied mind.”

Now, don’t get me wrong, Grandpa has been fortunate to be surrounded by family, as he has children, grandchildren and great grandchildren who live in Michigan, some of whom eventually came to live with him in his final years. But ever since Grandma died it’s been clear that a piece of his heart was missing.

This is the only tragedy surrounding his final days on earth. In fact, Grandpa always used to say that when old people die, that’s not a tragedy. He was proud of his old age, and he embraced it like no one I’ve known.

When I was in college he asked me once, “Why would I fear death? Do you remember what it was like before you were born?” “No,” I replied. “Did God hurt you or let you be hurt by others?” “No,” I repeated. “So it must be when you die,” he said. Simple logic to be sure but Grandpa had a way of taking all the stress and worry and other emotions out of aging and death and strip it down to a very simple, very understandable truth. We are born, we live, we die.

He was successful with this philosophy in large part because he had an unbelievable sense of humor and was always able to laugh at himself – even last summer when he walked out of his bedroom, to the bathroom and back before realizing he didn’t have on any pants. He was a joy to watch age in much the same way that a child is. On that same visit last summer, Scoot and I walked into his room and found him watching Coyote Ugly. He developed a crush on Jennifer Aniston and owned every season of Friends on DVD.

When my dad called to tell me the news of his passing early in February (he had fallen a couple days earlier and broken his leg so it was not a huge surprise), he told me that my aunt and uncle had just left him with some magazines to read and he was talking to the nurses and he just died. Now, I’m sure there’s more to the story than that, but I don’t want to know it.

Because in my mind, I have this perfect image of Grandpa lying in his hospital bed, reading a People Magazine with Jennifer Aniston on the cover, flirting with the nurses who are doting over him, a smile crossing his face and then him going home to Grandma. And there could be no more apropos way for him to leave this world.

It was an honor to know him, to love him, and to be loved by him. He and Grandma are both sorely missed.

Apr 09 2009
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Food, Vacation

Do Not Try This At Home

Today was the first full day of our Michigan “vacation.” I use the words in quotes because we’re here to celebrate my grandpa’s life which ended this winter. (I’ll have more on this later.) We arrived yesterday afternoon, had an uneventful drive from Detroit to Lansing (where we’re staying for the first half of our trip), ate dinner and tried to get the boys to go to bed at a reasonable time while their bodies were telling them they were still on Pacific time. That was fun…NOT! Scoot was laid up with a cold for most of the day so I took D and B to the zoo and later took D to the swimming pool. After his 1,000th nap of the day, Scoot was feeling better and suggested we head to Jackson (about 40 minutes by car) to try out a place he’d seen on the Man v. Food discussion boards called The Parlour.

*Fellow Shredheads and Team Bob – please look away from the computer*

Scoot and I each split a small meal with our boys and then went in for the kill: The Dare to Be Great! It is described as, “Twenty-one scoops of assorted flavors of ice cream, topped with strawberries, chocolate, pineapple and marshmellow toppings, chopped mix nuts, whipped cream and cherries.” It cost $29.99 (but it’s free if one person can finish it in one hour).

This is what it looked like just after arriving at our table:

ice-cream-before

(My God, every time I look at this picture I’m amazed at the volume of ice cream that’s floating around in our bodies at this moment.)

I should note that the arrival was accompanied by a chorus of ooohs and aaahs from other Parlour patrons.

We did a decent job on that bad boy. D was a trooper and totally helped out, even though they had brought him his own (free) sundae before dinner. After one hour it looked like this:

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Not bad for a day’s work. I’ll admit, though, I was a little upset that we didn’t finish the whole thing. I hate planning to do something and then not doing it. It frustrates me to no end. Though this will probably come as no surprise to anyone who knows me, I also got frustrated because the scoops were impossible to differentiate from one another. I’m someone who needs to visually see progress. I needed to know how many scoops we had left to motivate me to keep eating. My arteries are pleased that I stopped eating when I did.

For those of you who are wondering, the waitress said that about 10 people have successfully completed eating the entire Dare to Be Great! She said it’s the most disgusting thing she’s seen and she would have preferred going through life without having witnessed it.

Apr 02 2009
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Health & Exercise

Cardio Max – Level 1 – Day 1

Did Cardio Max today for the first time. Wow. It’s tough. But I think I like it. For those of you who haven’t tried this DVD, Bob leads it and you customize your workout so you select what you want to do: warm up, Level 1, Level 2, Level 3, and cool down. Once you select the workouts you want to do, they just play one after the other.

I only did the warm up and Level 1. I did some of the cool down, which is very yoga-inspired, but B insisted that I sit down so that he could do yoga on his own.

B in his warrior pose

B in his warrior pose

I am going to hurt tomorrow and even more so on Saturday, but it was definitely my kind of workout. Weights were optional, though if you’ll recall I only own 10 pound weights. I think I made it through about three-quarters of the video using the weights when they were called for but by the end I was pretty spent. My legs were especially burning.

Anyhow, today was a pretty good day. Not only did I exercise, but I also ate quite well including lots of fruits and veggies. I drank lots of water, didn’t go crazy with anything and I tracked it all on my Sparkpeople page. Yay! This is the kind of day I needed. Thinking I might try the yoga DVD tomorrow.

Apr 01 2009
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Food, Health & Exercise

No Joke, Today I Earned an F

Since it’s the first day of April, I thought I’d do a seperate entry for how things went today as a member of Team Bob. Keeping in mind my goals, I’d give myself a score of 50% which in most schools is an F. I’ll be a half full kind of girl, though, and say that the most important thing to my body has always been exercise (I can’t lose weight just by focusing on food) so I’m happy that I was at least active.

Here’s how I did today:

+ I walked about 2 miles with a colleague (twice around the park at the California state capitol)

+ Not only did I walk 2 miles, I did so in high heels (I figured I deserved extra credit for that)

+ I drank a good amount of water today

+ I didn’t have coffee this morning (I quit a few months ago but have been drinking coffee for the last week or so that I’ve been seriously sleep deprived)

- I drank a Dr. Pepper with lunch

- We went out to dinner and pretty much everything on my plate was fried.

It’s a start. I’m hoping to get to bed here soon so that when I wake up in the morning to let the dogs out I can do one of the videos. Wish me luck! (I’m SO not a morning person.)

Apr 01 2009
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Food, Health & Exercise, Me, Myself and I

Shredder Reloaded

In my post last month, I went out on a limb and posted by “before” pictures from the Jillian Michaels 30-Day Shred. I did it so that I’d hold myself accountable since, after all, not only did I tell you all I was going to commit to working out more, but I was actually SHOW you what would happen if I did.

The last few weeks (remember that I didn’t start with the rest of my Shredheads because I was sick) have been a bit of a challenge. I’ve had an unusually high number of afterwork activities, traveled on multiple weekends and have been really busy at work (including working late into the evening) which meant I was extremely tired and really didn’t want to work out. That being said, I wasn’t a total flake: I did the video a number of times and played in my weekly soccer game.

(Side note: I am definitely starting to get into soccer shape. I can finally run throughout the entire game – this is the first week we had girl subs – and my leg strength has increased so I can cross the ball from the wings again.)

The result is that, as of this Monday morning, I was down about 4 pounds from my weight one month ago. (That being said, a 4 pound weight fluctuation for me is not all that uncommon so don’t congratulate me too much.)

I’m going to keep up with my fellow Shredheads and join Team Bob. I decided to do this because it appears as though I don’t need weights to do this workout and I’m going to be traveling for a week. We’re bringing the DVD player and/or the laptop with us so I’ll be able to workout in the hotel room with the DVDs but I can’t do that if I’m going to need weights. (That’s not totally true. B likes to hang on me while I shred so that adds another 30 pounds or so right there, but not exactly the kind of weight I need.) 

I picked up Cardio Max because one thing that the 30-Day Shred is missing is much cardio and Weight Loss Yoga. I’m excited to see how these compare to the Shred. I’m also looking forward to catching up with Scoot, who has been working out for the past two or so weeks at our new gym.

Here are my goals:

  • Do the Bob videos at least 4 times per week, 5 if I don’t have a soccer game
  • On days I don’t do the video, get at least some amount of exercise: preferably on our elliptical machine or by walking
  • Start to track my food and exercise on sparkpeople.com (Perhaps a post is due on this because it’s a great tool.)
  • Stop drinking sodas (a new but not cool habit) 
  • Eat dinner at home at least 5 nights a week

Can’t wait to update you on how it goes.

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