I’ve Been Keeping Something From You

January 28, 2010 in Food, Health & Exercise, Me, Myself and I | 12 comments

Remember when I told you that “New Year’s resolutions suck”? Yeah, well I still believe that. But I don’t think making goals sucks.

I do hate publicly stating my goals and failing at them, however. (See here, here and here. ::hangs head in shame::) So on January 1, 2010, I set out to accomplish one very immediate, very doable thing today. I decided I would drink nothing but good not horrible stuff. While it was a simple, short-term goal, I decided not to tell anyone about it until I knew it’d be accomplished.

A few things to explain: my motivation was mostly health. I have a bet with a coworker and I need to lose some weight pretty quickly (think 20 pounds in 3 months…doable, but still). Anyone who has ever been on any type of weight loss program knows that Americans consume far too many liquid calories. I also have fear about what a lifetime of drinking soda has done or will do to me. I’ve dramatically cut back in recent years but when going out, I often indulge. Cutting it out certainly won’t harm me.

I had a hard time figuring out exactly what counted as “not horrible” because the primary issue is calories, but I believe strongly in drinking milk (I am 31 years old and have already been diagnosed with arthritis in my neck!). Because I wasn’t sure what I was counting and what I wasn’t, I had one non-alcoholic beer and two glasses of tomato juice early in the month.

But since then, I’ve had nothing but water, milk, coffee and tea. Absolutely nothing.

I still find myself craving something with flavor in the afternoon or early evening so I’ve got to figure out a good long-term solution. Perhaps I can figure out a juice spritzer type thing with real juice but not a lot of it. If you have any ideas, I’d love to hear them. I definitely don’t want to go back to having a Diet Coke every afternoon but after February 1st, if I have a craving for one I may just give in.

What this exercise taught me is that a month is not a long time even if those first few days seem impossible. And that it’s easier to accomplish your goals with help. (OK, so I didn’t announce it publicly but I did have some help from my friends.)

So now I’m thinking about figuring out something to do or give up every month this year. I’m not sure what that thing will be for February, but I’m looking for suggestions on that too.

If you set a New Year’s Resolution, how is it going? Do you need suggestions to make it easier to stick to? Perhaps we can help each other out a bit.

Your Child, Football, the NFL, and You

January 20, 2010 in Health & Exercise, Me, Myself and I, My Boys, Parenting, Sports | 9 comments

Last night, I watched Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel about head injuries in football and I just need to go off for a minute.

For those of you not following this issue closely, here’s the quick rundown on why you may care: hits to the head in football, even football played by cute little five-year olds, may exacerbate or be responsible for a host of very serious medical problems. There are two potential sources – not necessarily mutually exclusive – of these problems: 1.) Multiple concussions, especially concussions that aren’t allowed to heal properly; and 2.) Repetitive brain injuries from hundreds and thousands of not particularly hard hits to the head.

To date, the focus of this debate has been on former NFL players some of whom, along with their doctors, have come to suspect that concussions played a role in everything from severe depression and chronic headaches to dementia and early onset Alzheimer’s. I call it a debate because, until recently, it was the position of the NFL’s leading expert on this matter that these doctors and players were wrong. To their credit, the NFL has since begun taking steps to change their policies and educate the public about head injuries.

BUT, and here’s where my rant comes in, we are all fooling ourselves if we, as parents, believe that injuries to the head are only a problem when caused by a profession-on-professional hit. Players at all levels, all the way down to kindergarten – kids who are still required to be in booster seats when driving in a car – are knocking heads with other kids over and over and over and over and over and over again.

Why am I picking on parents? Well, for a few reasons. We throw our kids into sports thinking they have to get in early to be good, or we want to let them do what their friends are doing, yet we don’t know the basics about how to protect them. We’re talking about a period of time when their brains are rapidly developing. Yet the most important time for kids to learn the fundamentals of how to hit is early in their football careers, well before they’re being taught by professional coaches supported by a staff of trainers and doctors. More often than not, young children are being coached by one of us, a volunteer parent coach.

I’m not knocking volunteer coaches, but I have seen and heard of too many amped up men, some former high school football players, others who have never played the game, who get all riled up when an 11-year-old lands a hard hit on an opposing player. As the kid runs back over to the sideline he is patted on the helmet and told, “Good job.” This? Is not a good thing.

I’ve had other mothers say to me, “Well, that’s just the sport,” or “Your kid can get hurt playing soccer too.” All totally true. Heck, I broke my shin playing soccer and I was wearing shin guards. And yet it still doesn’t absolve us from doing what we can to protect our children. (Not to mention the fact that a broken shin, to me, is nowhere near brain damage in terms of injury severity…and a broken shin HURTS!)

So what’s a parent to do? Here are a few tips:

  • Think before putting your child in a tackle football league. Don’t just do it to keep up with the Joneses. Why are you doing this? What is your motivation? Are you keeping your child’s best interest in mind? (I know these are tough questions, but they’re important.)
  • Don’t assume that size matters. I’ve heard parents say that their kid is “big, so he’ll be ok,” or “too small to play.” Size is not always the issue. If repetitive hits to the head cause brain damage, that doesn’t necessarily mean those hits have to be hard or disproportionate to your child’s size. Two big children or two small children hitting one another in the head may be just as dangerous over the long run.
  • If you’re not willing to give up your dream of your kid someday playing in the NFL, keep them in touch or flag football as long as possible. If, in fact, the cumulative effect of a lifetime of hits to the head is a cause of long-term health problems, postponing – and therefore reducing the total number – of hits to the head can’t hurt. Sure, there is still risk of other types of injuries in touch or flag football, but the risk of these hit-related injuries would go down dramatically.
  • Before you sign your child up for tackle football, research the league’s policy on training coaches in the proper ways to hit and tackle. Find out what, if anything, they require with regards to medical professionals at practices and games. Do not sign your child up for a league that isn’t protecting his or her health and safety.
  • Talk to the coach about his or her philosophy on teaching safe tackling. Drop by a practice or two to make sure you’re comfortable with the coach’s approach. Do not allow your kid to play for a coach that is more interested in hitting hard and/or often than teaching the fundamentals of the game and protecting your child.
  • Make sure all equipment given to/purchased for your child fits well. Follow manufacturer instructions and try to purchase from a sporting goods or specialty store where they’ll do a fitting.
  • If your child gets hit hard, insist that he or she sit out the rest of the game and be sure to get him or her seen by a medical professional.
  • Educate yourself about proper diagnosis and treatment of concussions. Adhere to all of your doctor’s orders regarding recovery times.
  • Be your child’s advocate. If you aren’t willing to do it, who will be? I don’t know about you, but I’d rather be a wet blanket than be spoon-feeding my 50-year-old child in an Alzheimer’s care center.

* I am not a doctor and I’m definitely not hot enough to play one on TV. I am, however, the wife of a former Division I football player and mother, aunt and sister-in-law to a group of incredibly athletic boys whose safety I have a very vested interest in; and, yes, I am passionate (read: opinionated) about this issue. 

Resolved

December 31, 2009 in Me, Myself and I | 1 comment

In my humble opinion, New Year’s Resolutions suck. Why set a bunch of goals you know you’re not going to achieve? I know there are stats about how long it takes for people to fail at their New Year’s Resolutions but I’m not a negative enough person to dwell on those. So I’ll only say this: There was one year when I set a resolution and kept it. And here I am, five years later, quite proud of my resolve that year.

On January 1, 2005, I resolved to read 52 books within a year. I got the idea from a Time Magazine columnist who sought to accomplish the same task. I took books with me to the grocery store, to work, and on the Metro. I had one child at the time but on December 31, 2005, I accomplished my task. Though not every book was a Pulitzer winner, I did try to vary my reading between fiction and non-fiction. As I read, I wrote a list of the books I read, in order, including book type and date completed. I used the lined sheet of notebook paper as my bookmark. I kept it to remind myself that “if you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything.” (Thank you, Marty McFly!)

In honor of the one year that I accomplished my New Year’s Resolution, I’ve decided to publish the list of books I read in 2005. So, here goes. And to those of you who are setting resolutions this year, may you find as much pride in accomplishing them as I did in reading the books on this list.

  1. Founding Brothers by Joseph Ellis – NF – 1/1
  2. London Bridges by James Patterson – F – 1/2
  3. Sam’s Letters to Jennifer by James Patterson – F – 1/3
  4. Suspect by Michael Robotham – F – 1/5
  5. Presidential Leadership by Jame Taranto & Leonard Leo – NF – 1/15
  6. Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki – NF – 1/16
  7. Hour Game by David Baldacci – F- 1/20
  8. The Conspiracy Club by Jonathan Kellerman – F – 1/20
  9. How to Talk to a Liberal (If You Must) by Ann Coulter – NF – 1/29
  10. The Five Peopl You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom – F – 1/30
  11. One Up on Wall Street by Peter Lynch – NF – 2/8
  12. The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks – F – 2/12
  13. A Cold Heart by Jonathan Kellerman – F – 2/16
  14. Blow Fly by Patricia Cornwell – F – 3/3
  15. The Broker by John Grisham – F – 3/10
  16. My Sister’s Keeper by Jodi Picoult – F – 3/26
  17. Blink by Malcolm Gladwell – NF – 3/27
  18. The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri – F – 4/8
  19. How to Make Money in Stocks by William O’Neill – NF – 4/24
  20. The Purpose-Driven Life by Rick Warren – NF – 4/26
  21. Twenty-Four Lessons for Investment Success by William O’Neill – NF - 4/30
  22. The First Counsel by Brad Meltzer – F – 5/6
  23. Fourth of July by James Patterson – F – 5/10
  24. The Prince of Beverly Hills by Stuart Woods – F – 5/11
  25. Blind Descent by Nevada Barr – F – 5/15
  26. The Wedding by Nicholas Sparks – F – 6/3
  27. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden – F – 6/11
  28. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold - F – 6/12
  29. Fatal Flaw by William Lashner – F – 6/18
  30. Capital Crimes by Stuart Woods – F – 6/21
  31. Cracking Cases by Henry Lee – NF – 7/7
  32. Germs: Biological Weapons and America’s Secret War by William Broad, Judith Miller and Stephen Engelberg – NF – 8/7
  33. Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office by Lois P. Frankel – NF – 8/17
  34. Stop Digging Your Grave with a Knife and a Form by Mike Huckabee – NF – 8/17
  35. The DaVinci Code by Dan Brown – F – 8/20
  36. Angels and Demons by Dan Brown – F – 8/30
  37. The 10 Women You’ll Be by Age 35 by Alison James – NF – 9/3
  38. Self Defense by Jonathan Kellerman – F – 9/10
  39. Dark Justice by Jack Higgins – F – ??
  40. A Million Little Pieces by James Frey – NF (??? Heh.) – ??
  41. My Friend Leonard by James Frey – NF (??? Heh.) – 10/5
  42. Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair Game by Michael Lewis – NF – ??
  43. Narrantive of the Life of Fredereick Douglass by Frederick Douglass – NF – 10/23
  44. Twisted by Jonathan Kellerman – F – 11/1
  45. Hard America, Soft America by Michael Barone – NF – ??
  46. She’s Come Undone by Wally Lamb – F – ??
  47. Death Be Not Proud by John Gunther – F – ??
  48. Mary, Mary by James Patterson – F – ??
  49. Crimes Against Logic by Jamie Whyte – NF – ??
  50. Freakonomics by Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner – NF – ??
  51. The Camel Club by David Baldacci – F – 12/30
  52. Driven from Within by Michael Jordan – NF – 12/31

‘Twas the Night before Christmas: On Giving

December 24, 2009 in Family, Friends, Holidays, Me, Myself and I, My Boys, Parenting | Leave a comment

‘Twas the night before Christmas and, amazing enough,

My boys let me donate a bunch of their stuff.

“But, Mom, not this one, not those toys, not that!”

D said as I cleaned and he sat and he sat.

 

“D, you heard what I said about kids in need.

‘Tis the season for giving, not hoarding or greed.”

“I know, Mom. Ok,” he said with a pout.

He need not love it, this stuff must get out!

 

So we packed up the car, hauled the boxes away.

When we finished our mission, he turned to say,

“We gave all our toys to the kids without money.”

“Yes, yes we did, and I’m proud of you honey.”

 

A smile crossed his face, as his joy inside grew.

We looked at each other and then we both knew:

‘Tis better to give than receive, this is clear.

But it’s not just about toys or this time of the year.

 

The giving of love leads the heart to swell,

to a stranger, a child, or a friend you know well.

May we all love thy neighbor, those far and near,

And may you have a blessed and charitable New Year.

 

- Merry Christmas from the Johnsons

Christmas Dinner 2009

December 23, 2009 in Family, Food, Holidays, Vacation | Leave a comment

I’ve sucked about posting this month. I’ve been busy. Life has gotten away from me. The good news is that a very busy December at work was just how I needed to end the year – for many reasons. I’m hoping to spend some time over my two weeks off reflecting and writing. In the mean time, my sister and I have decided to undertake preparation of quite a Christmas feast. Many/most of the recipes are from Cooking Light (my fav food magazine). Of course the recipe with bacon is from Rachel Ray. Ha!

So here is what the Johnsons are having this Christmas:

I’ll try to take pics and do reviews of the recipes if any of you are interested. Ooooo…and look at the cute napkins that’ll be on the table:

What are y’all having? Any awesome recipes to share?

I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Here’s to a 2010 that is WAY better than 2009 (don’t think that’s going to be a hurdle to overcome).

Prayers for Anissa

November 18, 2009 in Blogging, Friends | 2 comments

I’m quite sure that many of you (at least 50% if my stat counter is correct) don’t quite “get” bloggers and these random people who live in my computer to and about whom I talk daily. As skeptical as many of you may be, it is with a heavy heart that I’m reminded today of just how real those people out there in the ether of the Internet really are.

A blogger, a friend, who is ridiculously funny, corrals the funny in others, and speaks out for those who are too young to speak for themselves, had a stroke today. She is young. She is a wife. She is a mom. And she needs all the love she can get.

Please, if you’re a person of faith, say prayers. If you’re not, send good thoughts and good vibes her way. She needs all the help she can get.

It may seem odd to some of you that I’ve taken such an interest in what seem to be strangers. But they’re not. Like many of my other friends who I met online and later met IRL (“in real life”…in case you couldn’t figure that out), they’re real people who need the love and support of people like me…and you. So, please, send #prayersforanissa.

To Anissa, the whole Interwebs is here waiting for you…we can’t wait for you to bring your funny back.

Warm Sun on the Skin

November 15, 2009 in My Boys, Parenting | 6 comments

Last Saturday morning, Bop and I were alone in the kitchen. The sun was shining through the sliding glass door. Bop walked into the bright sunlight, closed his eyes and smiled – his first real show of an appreciation of nature.

He stood there for a good 60 seconds just soaking up the rays with a smile on his face.

Then he turned and stuck his bottom out so the sun could warm it too. He is three afterall.

An Open Letter to Patience

November 5, 2009 in Family, Friends, Me, Myself and I, My Boys, Our 'Hood, Parenting, Work | 1 comment

Dear Patience,

I miss you. No, truly, I do. I miss the warmth of your long held embrace. The calm that you exude when you’re around. The rational thoughts you put into my mind. I miss you more than you know.

I have respected you for a long time, looked up to you. I have tried to walk your walk. “Good things come to those who wait,” I say to myself and others with frequency. I have long been a fan of the tortoise. “Slow and steady wins the race.” I know your value.

But Bop, Patience. He’s killing me. I know it’s a phase. I know I let D go through the same I-can’t-possibly-live-without-my-mommy-so-I-must-cry-whenever-she-wants-to-leave-me-because-my-world-will-end-without-her phase. I know he deserves you. But, Patience, I feel like you’re pushing me away with a brute force I haven’t felt in a while.

And he’s not the only one testing our relationship. D, dude. D is giving you a run for your money too. He is awesome at night when both Scoot and I are around. But in the mornings… Gah! It’s like he knows you’re at your rarest and yet still tries to find you somewhere within me by pushing every possible button I have. Unfortunately for us all, he fails as you so often seem to have deserted me.

There are other ways you’re testing me, Patience. Many, many other ways: at work, at home, in my family, with my friends, in my community, even the dogs are working my last nerve. Sometimes I feel like others are so intent on proving that you and I are, in fact, not on speaking terms that they do whatever they can to drive us apart.

I can’t live this way, Patience. I mean, come on, your name graces the title of one of my favorite songs of all time. I need you. Yeah, Yeah, I need you. Oooo I need you. Oh, sorry…got a little carried away there.

One of my favorite (Swedish, BTW) proverbs says, “Those who wish to sing always find a song.” I hope that’s true, Patience. Because I miss you. I want to sing your song. I must find it. I have to.

Come back to me, Patience. Please.

Love,

EmmieJ

Truly Spooky Halloween Pictures

October 31, 2009 in Family, Holidays, Me, Myself and I | 4 comments

We had a great Halloween in these here parts. But I’ve spent enough time on Facebook and Twitter that I’m sort of over looking at pictures of adorable looking kids in their oh-so-cute costumes. If you’re in the same boat as me, I have just the cure.

Behold, Emmie’s life in awkward Halloween costume photos.

Emmie (in the middle) as a Good Humor (Wo)Man. I think I must have been about four in this pic. The haircut is unfortunate, no?

Emmie (in the middle) as a Good Humor (Wo)Man. I think I must have been about three or four in this pic. The haircut is unfortunate, no?

Emmie at age five. This was one of two costumes I wore this year. The other was a cheerleader outfit (because a witch was too scary for school). That wart was made from gum my mom chewed and stuck to my nose. Klassy.

Emmie at age five. This was one of two costumes I wore this year. The other was a cheerleader outfit (because a witch was too scary for school). That wart was made from gum my mom chewed and stuck to my nose. Klassy. By the way, that woman is not my mom...that's the world's best preschool teacher Ms. Mary Beth.

Emmie at age seven as a spider. The legs were made out of my mom's pantyhose stuffed with newspaper and spraypainted black.

Emmie at age seven as a spider. The legs were made out of my mom's pantyhose stuffed with newspaper and spraypainted black. I was apparently a six-legged spider. Cannot for the life of me remember why I didn't have eight legs like every other spider. Probably because I always had to be different.

Emmie uses grease paint. On her face and in her hair. (Ask anyone, hair color doesn't stick in my hair.) I was 11 in this picture and I'm pretty this is the last year I dressed up. Way to go out with a bang, huh?

Emmie uses grease paint. On her face and in her hair. (Ask anyone, hair color doesn't stick in my hair.) I was 11 in this picture and I'm pretty sure this is the last year I dressed up. Way to go out with a bang, huh?

So there you have it, quite possibly the most embarassing Halloween pictures ever taken. Now, go back at look at those cute pics you took of your kids and count your blessings. Until next year…

***I have to tell you, I’m pretty upset that mom and dad failed to keep a picture of the best. costume. ever. created. by. human. hands. (or something like that). In 3rd grade I was a stoplight. And I worked. My dad and I worked on it for weeks. I had a sandwhich board box contraption spray painted black. We drilled holes in three bowls that were covered in celophane. We installed lights and connected each to a nine volt battery and a three-way switch on the side of the box. I could change colors by turning a dial. It was awesome. And frankly it has never been topped. Don’t you hate it when you peak at age eight?

Darn You Biggest Big Book of Toys Ever!

October 29, 2009 in Holidays, My Boys, Parenting | 10 comments

Sunday afternoon we realized the boys hadn’t been outside in 24 hours, an unfortunate but not uncommon occurrence in the Johnson house. We all got ready and headed out to dinner. On the way to the car, D and I stopped by the mailbox to grab the ghosts of trees past.

Within milliseconds of the key turning and the first ray of daylight peeking into the steel home of household correspondence, D saw it.

“Mommymommymommy!” he exclaimed while pushing my hand out of the way. There goes my mommy grade of A for teaching patience.

Out comes all parents’ arch nemesis during the Christmas season. (Christmas?!?! It’s not even Halloween!) The Toys R Us Big Book of Toys. And this year it proudly proclaimed it wasn’t your average Big Book of Toys. Oh no, it’s the Biggest Big Book of Toys Ever. I had met my match. It may only be October 25th but GAME ON!

“Bop! Bop! We got a newspaper, Bop!” Guess he didn’t get the memo about the “Biggest Big Book of Toys Ever” title change.

Excitedly, the boys sat in the back seat trading “I want that”s.

They read it before bed. They tucked it in their bedside table while they slept.

Normally as soon as they wake in the morning they come find me right away, no matter how inconvenient. (Hello, glass shower door and no door to the master bathroom.) On Monday morning, no bleary eyes stumbled through my bedroom to find me. When I emerged from my room I heard it: the undeniable sound of pages turning.

I walk into the room and see it. The page. The most dreaded page.  That’s right, you guessed it. The page with the motorized ride-on toys.

“I want that one,” D says pointing to the pimped out Escalade.

“Shoot, I want that one,” I mutter under my breath.

“And Bop wants that one,” he says pointing to a John Deere tractor.

“I don’t know about all that,” I say.

“But it’s only fifty dollars.”

“No, it says you save fifty dollars, dude. It’s three hundred and twenty nine dollars. And ninety-nine cents.” *Pauses for dramatic effect* “For one.”

He smacks his lips and goes back to mentally composing his plea to Santa.

Tuesday night as he’s getting ready for bed, he brings up The Biggest Big Book of Toys Ever yet again.

“Mommy, Bop doesn’t want that one anymore. He wants this one,” he says pointing at a different John Deere contraption.

“Babe, I don’t know if Santa is going to have enough money for all that,” I try to explain.

“Why not?”

“Two words: global recession.”

*Big sigh*

I tuck him into bed and kiss him goodnight.

The next morning I go into his room. Again, he’s in bed coveting “reading” about plastic miniturized gas guzzlers. The book hasn’t been in our house for a week yet it already looks as dog-eared as the Gutenberg Bible.

“Mom,” he says.

“Yeah, baby,” I fearfully reply.

“I have a great idea.”

Uh oh.

“Since Santa doesn’t have enough money to get me and Bop our presents can you and Daddy get them?”

Grrrrrr.

That kid better hope that Santa his dad gets lucky in Vegas when we go in a couple weeks. Or do you think Santa will go in half with us?

I thought about asking him as I drove home from work today. And then I open the door to this:

IMG_3599

(Yes, he is composing his letter to Santa. On October 29th.)

Darn you Biggest Big Book of Toys Ever!